Tuesday, November 2, 2010

I struggle

I wrote this last week I just have yet to post it..

Now that I have no more excuses to use! I hope that I will find myself improving in my lack of thing I struggle with...

Here I am in the middle of the week and I just want to give up my goals. BECAUSE I LACK THE TIME TO STICK TO SOMETHING! Still I feel overwhelmed and I struggle, I mean really struggle. So many things to do and so LITTLE time. I am trying to finish most of my assignments before my hubby and I take off for our annual thanksgiving vacation. Yah in one week we will be hitting Detroit, MI, Pittsfield MA and Boston, MA.
If I wasn’t owned by the state, then we be driving through Canada. GAH!

See my list goes as this I WANT to graduate in Dec of this year. I have 18 credits to complete, six of which are incomplete that I HAVE to finish them by DEC 8th. I STRUGGLE again with Genetics. { Note to self to never become a doctor} I hate science. God, Thank you for your creations but I do not understand Genetics! I have to take this course as an upper level science class in order to graduate. I fail! I have ONE book report, ONE term paper, EXAMS that I need to study for. When will this end. Plus I am coming back to school in the Spring. How am I to DO all of this and come back next spring. Crazy? Right. I have NO EXCUSES! { Well except watching the RANGERS winning the World Series} My husband helps me out when I need it. He a genius he helps me understand the concept of something I just don’t get.

I admit I am a HORRIBLE housekeeper. In our room you will find 2 weeks of laundry on the floor and a bed not made. Papers everywhere, dust bunnies creeping up. I said I wasn’t a good housekeeper. So I have no excuse right we pay my mom 50 dollars to clean the house so why is it that I can’t get what I need done. You know the saying “ You can’t teach an old dog new tricks.” Yeah well since we decided to eliminate our Dish TV. { bye bye DVR, I will see you again someday} I study more, I focus more and I still can’t get things DONE! I TRY and TRY then I fail. Why??? Time management. I give kudos to people who do follow a schedule. I know it may not work for some people and it may for others. Really if I were to discipline myself since I could walk maybe I would be better. See I am learning something new I just have not yet mastered. So If I put my whole blog and relate it to the bible of how God can really work in our life. I be amazed what I continue to learn.When we first realize that God is our father and we will not enter the gates of heaven with out Jesus Christ. (John 4:16) when you become saved you are so eager to hear his word, his promises and the fire is with you. As time goes on we get distracted make excuses and we lose our way. My point is that I need to treat school as I do with God. God should be my priority and I need to be motivated and eager and on FIRE everyday not just with God, but with marriage, school, and church. I have to ACCEPT that I am not perfect, I am not going to have a clone of me everyday to do my job. I have to accept that I do not have the POWER to do everything. God can do everything. I can’t do everything. If I ask God to give me the patience, the peace and help me Try to do as much I will succeed. Someday I will Master my life as a Christian woman through him. Someday I will Master my time management through him. Someday I will master what I don’t and accept the things that I have no control over and let it be. I will be able to do the things I should be able to do. WITH God’s help. I give him all the GLORY of what he has taught me these past few weeks.

1 comment:

  1. So now I don't have to feel bad I don't have a perfect house and to have that I should say bye bye to internet but we haven't let it go yet. I need to. Internet takes a lot of my time and lot of it is waste why do I need to get on FB to read about everyone's day it's not that important my family should be more important and the house and getting things done. I feel bad every day because when the day is over I look back and say man I spend to much doing this and not enough doing this. I am too bad I guess I need to learn to say only get online between the times10-11p or something but I always feel like I am missing something. I don't know I am on now lol